Court this morning was so slow, I could actually hear the wheels of justice grinding to a halt. At one point (after my caffeine withdrawal had become so intense that I was starting to hallucinate), I had to physically restrain myself from standing up and disrupting court. I don't know why it would be so inappropriate to just say, "Look your Honor, I know we're busy bringing justice to the people and whatnot, but I have a giant chocolate cupcake with orange frosting and little black bat sprinkles on it that I need to eat right now. And if I don't get my Diet Dew soon, people could get hurt."
I have to go finish licking orange frosting off my fingers. Happy Halloween!